literature

Just Like Old Times Ch. 3

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Liara found herself deep in her work, managing information and collecting as much intel as she possibly could on the Reapers and the Crucible when there was a knock at her door. She forgot hours ago that she had her AI, Glyph, lock it. "Oh, just a moment," she called out and pressed a button on her terminal to unlock the door. The person who was standing on the other end was the second to last person that she wanted to see in her room. "Oh, Garrus," she threw on a mental mask and smiled at the turian. "Did you get my message from Shepard?"

Garrus gave her a curious look and shook his head, "No, we were kind of busy." He shifted awkwardly and cleared his throat, "What was it?"

Liara wanted to scream, but she kept her poker face strong. "Oh, I just said to tell you hello," she gave another smile and forced a soft chuckle. "What can I do for you, Garrus?" Saying the turian's name felt like poison on her tongue and having him in her room for whatever reason was like twisting a finger in an open wound.

"I was just wondering if you found anything that would be helpful to the Normandy's weapon system," he said and pointed in the direction of the main battery and weapons unit.

"No," Liara shook her head and drew in a soft breath, "...but if I find anything, I will be sure to let you know." She looked back at her terminal and Garrus nodded.

"Thank you, Liara," he stated and turned to walk out of her room. Liara did not watch as he walked away.

"Garrus," she called after him and he stopped before leaving the room. Liara could not believe that she was going to do this. Then again, she was surprising herself left and right today, and besides, she doubted that Shepard wanted to talk to her now. "Could you tell Shepard that I am sorry for earlier? I did not mean to disturb the two of you," she knew that she was lying, but it didn't matter. Garrus had the one thing that she wanted the most, and she could do nothing but sit back and watch.

Liara heard the door shut behind Garrus and was thankful that he was gone. She couldn't get rid of the bad taste that was left in her mouth when the turian had hinted that he and Shepard had sex after she had made an attempt to tell the commander how she felt. In a way, Liara almost wanted to laugh; when Javik had mentioned that Shepard and Liara had some sort of bond, the commander didn't deny it, and when she had asked Shepard herself what they were, she didn't have an answer.

"Glyph, scan the extranet for anything that may strengthen the Normandy's weapon system," she commanded to the AI, who began to run a search across the entire extranet. Liara was aware that the search would take a while, so she decided to leave her room for a little while. "Send copies to both Garrus and Shepard once you have finished," she said as she walked out the door.

Liara took the elevator to the second level and walked to the cockpit. She figured that Joker would offer some sort of distraction for her. However, once she got there, Liara realized that she should have just stayed in her room. Shepard was in there, speaking with Joker and Kaidan. She watched as Shepard's eyes met with her own. Liara didn't keep the contact long, but what she saw in Shepard's gaze surprised her. There was guilt buried deep within her eyes and the asari wondered if Shepard could read her as well.

"Hey, Liara!" Joker's cheerful voice broke into Liara's theorizing mind and she smiled at him in response. "The commander, Kaidan, and I were just reminiscing the good old days on the original Normandy."

Kaidan Alenko, the original one that Liara had been worried Shepard would select over her. Turned out that in the end, she didn't want either of them. "I was just wondering if we were going to the Citadel any time soon. I have a package that I need to pick up," she paused and smiled at Joker, "Shadow Broker business."

"Actually we were going to go to Tuchanka to see how the cure was wor-" Joker started to talk but Shepard looked at him and he stopped talking.

"I'm pretty sure that we'll hear from Wrex soon enough," she chuckled and Kaidan joined in.

"Yeah, the second that Wrex is one-hundred percent sure that the genophage is being cured, we'll hear from him, guaranteed," Kaidan said before leaving the room.

"Joker, take us to the Citadel," she stated and began to walk out of the cockpit. However, Shepard stopped right beside Liara and the asari found her bearings to shake. Her voice was low, hardly a whisper but Liara still heard her. "Stop apologizing, Liara." The commander continued to walk and Liara followed her until she was at her side and in step with her.

They went without saying anything until the reached the elevator. Liara knew that her courage wouldn't last for long but she needed to talk. Shepard turned off the elevator's power and looked at Liara. "What's bothering you?" It was a stupid question and both knew it. Shepard felt that she should ask anyway.

"Liara, there's no one here listening and nothing to distract us. So talk to me," Shepard felt her own guilt flood her tone and she dropped her eyes from looking at the asari to looking at the elevator floor.

Liara could tell her everything. How much it hurt when she had chosen a turian over her, how she ran off to have sex with that same turian after Liara had admitted her attraction to her, and everything else. But she decided to keep it short. "What I asked earlier, Shepard. You never gave me an answer and you never denied Javik saying that you and I have a bond stronger than friendship. So answer me, Shepard. What are we?" Her pulse kicked up and she stared at Shepard. She wasn't going to give. No, she wanted an answer this time.

Shepard hesitated before she answered. She did love the asari, she would never deny that, and they did have something stronger than friendship, but in all honestly Shepard didn't know what it was. "Liara, we have something. We always have, but we let it pass us by two years ago," she sighed and looked her over. Shepard noticed that Liara was shaking and her eyes were closed.

"We did not let it pass us by, Shepard. It has never left and deep down you know that. That is why there was guilt in your eyes when you looked at me when you talking to Joker, and why you were protective of me when Javik said that I was interested in him," Liara paused and opened her eyes to show that they were glazed over with tears that she refused to let fall. "Shepard, I know that you are with Garrus, but you have to know that I love you," she muttered softly and dropped her hand from Shepard's face.

Liara leaned over and turned the elevator on again, only to have Shepard's hand cover hers and turn it off. "Liara, you don't think that I love you? You don't think that I feel awful about not saying anything two years ago? I feel terrible, Liara. And I have to deal with the regret of never knowing what would have been..." Shepard held Liara's hand in hers and closed her eyes.

The asari moved closer to Shepard, wrapped her hand around the commander's waist and Shepard opened her eyes. "Liara," she whispered and rested her free hand on the back of the asari's neck. Their lips staggered together slowly, both asari and human fought off the last bit of reserve and control that they had. The hands that were entwined broke. Shepard's rested on Liara's hip and the previously free one, was held captive by Liara, resting now at her neck. Shepard's lips danced upon Liara's. It was definitely different from Garrus. It was softer, delicate, smooth, and easy. Their tongues danced together in a tender movement, neither demanded anything, they just shared each other.

Liara breathed in what Shepard breathed out as their mouths parted. Shepard pressed her forehead against the asari's and held her hands at her waist. They stared at each other with tender affection and just breathed.

"Goddess," she cooed and kissed the commander's lips once again before turning on the elevator. "What floor do you need to go to, Shepard?" Liara asked, her hand wavering over the terminal.

"I was going to talk to Gar-" her voice cut off and her eyes dimmed. It was in this moment that Shepard realized that she didn't feel guilty for kissing Liara, she enjoyed it.

"I have to go back to my quarter's anyway. I had Glyph run a scan for any possible upgrades to the Normandy's weapon system," Liara pressed the button signalling to go to floor three and looked at the door. "Shepard, thank you," her velvet voice hummed as she walked out of the elevator and down the hallway to her room.

Shepard followed behind her, but at a safe distance. Both asari and human saw Garrus at the same time, but their reactions were somewhat different. Liara took a couple of steps back, closer to Shepard, who was frozen in her place.

"Garrus," Liara's voice held a surprised edge to it. She wasn't going to give away Shepard, nor the moment that they had just had in the elevator. If the commander wanted her turian boyfriend to know, she would tell him. She took a couple of steps toward Garrus, whose back was pressed against the wall. "Did Glyph send you the search results for possible upgrades?" Her tone smoothed out and the asari held a professional disposition.

The turian's eyes settled on Shepard first and saw her to look even more bothered than before. Then his gaze moved to Liara, who seemed just a bit too businesslike for her own good. Something happened between the two of them that had Shepard worried, and anyone who knew Shepard knew that she did not worry without cause.

"I did, Liara, thank you," he nodded as he spoke. His mind was still focused on Shepard and how she purposely avoided his eyes. Perhaps he would talk to her later, but he wouldn't pressure her.

"Commander," Joker's voice came over the comm system, "we've reached the Citadel."

"Thanks, Joker," Shepard welcomed the distraction from Garrus and she all but ran away from him to get off the Normandy. Shepard could feel Liara look back at her as she walked away. There was guilt that planted itself within Shepard. And it wasn't because she felt guilty for kissing the asari, no, it was because she didn't feel guilty at all. Liara's lips and presence felt right to her.

Shepard selected autotransport to the hospital to speak with Thane Krios, former assassin and good friend. He had loved once and he had his fair share of regrets. Shepard just needed to talk to someone who wasn't on the Normandy breathing down her neck. Upon arrival she swiftly made her way to where he sat, his breathing was stable as he stared out the window.

"Shepard," he said without moving his body, but there was a smile in his coarse voice. As Shepard moved closer to the drell, he stood to greet her. "It's nice to see you again," he motioned to the seat beside him. "Forgive my intrusion, Shepard, but you seem as though something is bothering you. Are you alright?" Thane returned to his seat, Shepard sat in the chair beside him, and they stared out the window together.

"To be honest Thane, yes, there is something bothering me, but I don't know exactly how it's bothering me yet," Shepard sighed and leaned back in the seat finding the cushions hard and hospital-like. It figured that the council wouldn't bother to give the patients higher quality comforts.

"Your problem seems to sound more like a who than a thing, but I will not ask you any further on the subject," Thane nodded understandingly and placed his head on his folded hands.

"How are you holding up?" Shepard asked in regards to Thane's illness, Kepral's Syndrome, which could be compared to human's Cystic Fibrosis. He had it when he was part of the team on the Normandy, but she knew that it was taking a larger toll on him now than before.

"I'm alive, that's enough for me. When it is my time, Shepard, I will be ready. I have asked for my forgiveness," he stated before muffling a cough. Thane looked around before looking toward the entrance of the hospital. "We have company," he said with a smile and looked back to Shepard.

The Commander looked behind her and saw Garrus walking towards them. She felt her heart pick up and at once she calmed it. She had only kissed Liara, nothing more, and she doubted that it was going to expand into anything, or at least that's what she hoped for. Shepard calmed herself and remembered earlier events, the shower mainly. It didn't take long before a smile appeared on her lips and she heard Thane get up to greet the Turian.

"Thane, how have you been?" Garrus shook the drell's hand and shifted his eyes to Shepard, who was surprisingly different from what she had been on the Normandy not fifteen minutes ago. He mentally shrugged it off and returned his gaze back to his former teammate.

"As I was just telling Shepard, I'm alive and that serves purpose enough," Thane nodded and returned to his seat. The drell watched as the turian and the human subconsciously gravitated together. Shepard remained seated and Garrus stood beside her, their hands slowly found each other and Thane suppressed a smile at the couple. It reminded him of his deceased wife and how they would just come together whether they realized it or not.

"Has Kolyat come to visit you?" Shepard asked as her entwined hand freed itself and placed itself within her lap. Thane nodded and a slight smile came across his lips.

"He visits often. He has grown into a fine man and I know that Irikah would be proud of him. I am," he said and blinked slowly. Once his eyes were open again he saw that Garrus was looking down at Shepard as though he wanted to speak with her. "I should go talk to a nurse about my prescription needing refilled," he nodded to both Shepard and Garrus before getting up to leave.

Shepard watched as Thane left and smiled. A thought crossed her mind and she wanted to push it away at first, but instead she let it in. What if she had children of her own? There was no doubt that she would give them everything that she could and then some, and she knew that Garrus would be, without a doubt, a loving father. Maybe once this was over she would talk to him about it, if they made it out alive. Garrus' voice broke into her daydream of little Vakarians and Shepards.

"Are you alright, Shepard?" Garrus had sat beside her and held a very concerned disposition within his tone.

Shepard sighed and shifted in her seat. She knew that she had to tell him about Liara and the kiss that they had shared not that long ago. The Commander drew in a breath and closed her eyes. When she opened them, they were dark and clouded. Her cheerful face had drifted into a depressed state. "I'll be fine, Garrus...I just," she sighed and shook her head.

"Need some time?" he spoke when Shepard was silent. Garrus sat in the chair in front of her and placed his hand on her knee. "You're diving head first into a war that you didn't ask for. While everyone else is running scared, you're standing like a stone wall. You've always been that way. It's who you are. But sometimes walls chip and crack."

Shepard looked at him with a questioning glance, but still held her dejected presence. She grabbed his hand and held it there.

"It's at that moment when the walls need support. Something there to assist them. Shepard, you aren't alone. You have people who care about you..." he paused for a moment, and his voice dropped to a lower volume, "You have people who love you, Shepard. Find strength in that."

Shepard looked down and then back to Garrus. How could she tell him now? How could she have ever done what she had in the first place? Garrus was there for her every time that she had needed a shoulder to lean on, someone to have her back, and share something sacred with. He was there for her. She stood up and walked to the massive windowed walls. Once again, the image of having a family with him took over her mind. This time it didn't leave, it lingered.

Garrus stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He sighed when she held them in place. "I'm here for you, Shepard," he whispered in her ear.

Her head turned and rested against his chest. She closed her eyes and breathed. For a moment, her problems melted. The Reapers were nonexistent, the galaxy wasn't going to Hell in a handbasket. Everything was at peace. Shepard shifted a little, relaxed further into the turian's hold. Her eyes opened and reality set in. Life wasn't perfect. It wasn't even remotely okay.
I changed this around a bit. There wasn't much to go off of with my previous ending to the chapter. I truly apologize if you don't want to see this in your dA messages.

Anyway, I figured that I can't help but swim in a vast, colossal ocean of Shakarian feelings.

I am not sorry for that.
It's my forever OTP.
Unless it's MShep. Then it's Shenko.
Mass Effect belongs to BioWare
© 2012 - 2024 ephoni
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guardian-diamond's avatar
Hum, well I like this new ending to the chapter but I thought the other was good too :D. This way does leave more to be discussed later though so that's good.